Washington D.C. police announced that they have arrested Vice President Dick Cheney on charges of taking part in the crime ridden city's latest drive-by shooting.
According to newly sworn-in police chief O.J. Simpson, Cheney is the alleged trigger-man in the incident, which occurred Thursday evening outside a nightclub in the upscale Georgetown section, on the city's Northwest side. According to police reports, Cheney, who was traveling in his usual 18-car motorcade pulled up outside Club "W" and began flashing gang signs at several people in the parking lot. When a man flipped the bird at Cheney, the veep produced an Uzi machinegun and opened fire, killing the man who flipped him off and wounding several bystanders. Cheney and his motorcade then sped away, according to the police report.
"It was a pretty stupid thing to do", Chief Simpson said. "I mean, we got a good description of gunman. Not too many people drive with a motorcade." Simpson said that his heart goes out to Cheney. "I understand him. I know what it's like to get all mad, lose control and kill people. I don't know what he's gonna do. Johnnie Cochran passed away last year. I just hope Dick can get a good lawyer, poor guy."