CCN (Crazy Cal News) - Washington - For Memorial Day, President George W. Bush visited the Arlington National Cemetery.
"I should pay these guys a visit," said Bush, "I put half of them in here, heh heh."
President Bush was very careful to be sure to step on each and every grave at the cemetery, saying that he wanted to be sure there wasn't a soldier that he hadn't stepped on in some way.
After stepping on the last grave, President Bush visited the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier. He became outraged when he saw it.
"This is the kind of goverment spending I want to cut out! Why are we payin' for a tomb for someone who was unknown? This kind of treatment shud be reserved fer celeburties an' presidents. We coulda used that money to buy moonshine for the Corrupt Bastards Club meeting," said Bush. "This big rock here would look good on my ranch in Crawford, though, right next to my barbeque pit. Boys! Bring my pick-up truck and load 'er up!"