Phil Spector Murder Trial Lacks 'Race Card' to Play; Causes Court TV's Less than stellar Ratings

Funny story written by Robert W. Armijo

Thursday, 10 May 2007

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Spector murder trial lacks 'Race Card' Court TV may fold

Los Angeles, California - In the trial of his life, Phil Spector, accused of murdering actress, Lana Clarkson, at his Alhambra mansion in Southern California in 2003, has been covered in the regular media and carried on the salacious cable show Court TV. According to TV ratings released yesterday, however, the public interest in the murder trial is not as lustrous as with the O.J. Simpson trial and even beginning to show signs of waning, spelling trouble for Spector.

"Spector has done everything he could, including changing his hairstyle and hiring a fashion consult to boost the show's ratings, but nothing has worked so far," said a Court TV producer. "If he doesn't bring up the ratings by next month, we may have to cancel him."

That would mean bad news for Spector because without the media spotlight on him he runs the danger of jurors realizing he is just like them. Then he truly will be at the mercy of the Court, suffering the fate of having to be tried as an ordinary citizen.

At a lost for the reason for the drop in ratings, media analyst and Court TV consultant, John Baker, speculates, "Possibly the American public has just caught on that there is no 'Race Card' [using racial inequality as a defense for otherwise indefensible actions] or other real underlining racial issues at all to be played out here as with other celebrity murder trials like the O.J. Simpson case."

"If only Spector would have allegedly killed someone from another race other than his own," continued Baker, "Or even another ethnicity, then we'd have a murder trial the public would watch."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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