After not just getting in touch with the present moment but grasping onto it with all his might, Nate Daniel of Boise, Idaho, found that it frustratingly eluded his grasp, leaving him stuck in the same ole, same ole of life.
“Honestly, it kind of blows,” said Daniel. “Getting that taste of nirvana and having it yanked away is almost worse than never having experienced it at all.” He sighed. “Dukkha, you know?”
Daniel explained that as a lifelong spiritual seeker who came to question the traditional stories he had been fed about God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit, he found that he resonated with the Buddhist emphasis on mindfulness and the present moment. In particular, Daniel found great benefit in a mindfulness practice referred to as “dropping anchor,” in which he would note three things he could see, three things he could hear, three things he could feel, then wiggle his fingers, wiggle his toes, and ground himself by pushing into the earth with his feet.
When he first dropped that anchor into the present moment, Daniel felt an immense sense of relief, safe from the vagaries of his mind and the tumult of his emotions that had previously swept him away in their wake, leaving him shipwrecked, scattered, and battered. Unfortunately, however, the effectiveness of the dropping anchor technique waned over time – or was perhaps too effective.
“My anchor became an albatross, pulling me back the present moment that once was but was no longer, if that makes sense,’ said Daniel. He chuckled darkly. “Who am I kidding? It doesn’t make sense even to me.”
He did his best to paraphrase succinctly. “I guess what I’m saying is Buddhist blasphemy. Even the present moment let me down.”
He shook his head, and his expression turned stoic. “But I’m moving on. Maybe the next one will be better, and will last a little longer. We can only hope, right?”
