EAGLE PASS, Texas - (Satire News) - United States Custom Agents report finding cocaine stuffed in a shipment of vibrators.
US agent Mills R. Sunfax said that the coke was found in 200 vibrators that were in an 18-wheeler truck that was bound for Milwaukee, Wisconsin.
Sunfax said that the street value of the cocaine, which was found to be 99.91% pure was $35.8 million.
The Yucatan White Cocaine was manufactured in a cocaine factory located in the southern state of Yucatan, in Mexico.
The driver, identified as Lorenzo "Bucky" Lozano told the authorities that he had no knowledge of the coke stuffed vibrators.
A spokesperson for the Eagle Pass Custon Dept. said that Lozano was given a lie detector test, which he passed with a score of 99¼.
SIDENOTE: Lozano was allowed to return to his home in Poza Rica, Mexico, after signing a paper that he would never again set foot in the USA.
