Some have said – possibly Ron DeSantis – that America has now been turned into a banana republic after Mar-A-Lago got raided by the FBI.
Others have said that America was turned into a big banana when Trump campaigned to become Head Banana.
So this reporter went to the Head of the Banana Republica of San Juan, Nicaragua.
“Oh yes,” he began, “when you get the big banana, there’s no stopping the fruit. Little bananas come out of the woodwork and want to be big, but there can only be one Big Banana. And you got to watch our for the spiders! Oh yes, big furry tarantulas live in every bunch of bananas. You can usually tell them by their 8 legs, their black fur, and their MAGA hats. Filthy scum, parasites, hangers-on, those are the putas you really can’t trust. They can turn a banana into mush ‘cuz the banana is too stupid to think for itself.”
Soon after this interview, Donald Trump was seen standing in mourning – wearing a black armband – as he stood on a Mar-A-Lago balcony. He wore a general’s military uniform with a very YUGE hat and a chest full of medals, none of which he earned, except for the one in the shape of a big banana.
From that balcony, he began a 4 hour speech about how great he was and how evil everyone else was.
Whether politician or pope, never trust any banana speaking from a balcony.
Instead, make a banana milkshake! Those are yummy! (But watch for spiders.)
