NEW YORK CITY - (Satire News) - The union that represents airport security guards, (aka Friskers) are very angry at the new advancement.
BuzzFuzz is reporting that close to 78% of the "Friskers" have been laid off due to the fact that every major American airport has installed the new, state-of-the-art Automatic Frisking Machines.
A spokesperson for JFK Airport stated that after interviewing 907 women, between the ages of 22 and 72, 91% told him that they absolutely love the hell out of the new Automatic Frisking Machines.
One recently divorced lady, who is a Dentist from Detroit, said that the AFM gave her the best fucking airport body frisk that she has ever received.
Another woman, a pole dancer from Cleveland, admitted that the new "Frisker" turned her on so much, that she decided to go through the boarding line three times.
SIDENOTE: A spokesman for Jet Blue Airlines noted that his company is very happy that every women who goes through the Automatic Frisking Machine boards her plane with a huge, gigantic smile on her satisfied face.