SOS from Jon Taffer and Bar Rescue

Funny story written by Earthvessel

Tuesday, 13 July 2021

image for SOS from Jon Taffer and Bar Rescue
"Taffer’s eyes had the look of a cornered wild boar who couldn’t decide whether to attack or make a run for it.”

The timing was perfect. Jon Taffer, star of Bar Rescue, had just launched into his customary rant aimed at another fledgling proprietor when he got the surprise of his life. Rick Regan and crew entered the scene on behalf of Reality Fix to turn the tables on Taffer. It was the debut episode for Reality Fix, a show with the mission of “keeping all reality TV real and legit!”

“What makes you think people want to watch you behave like a brazen alpha male baboon every damn week? Are you nuts Jon?!!” Regan snapped at the stunned Taffer.

Initially Taffer showed a flash of anger at having his customary tirade interrupted, but thought better of it when he saw Regan’s Reality Fix production crew. Camera operator Tom Frank said “Taffer’s eyes had the look of a cornered wild boar who couldn’t decide whether to attack or make a run for it.”

Thew Bar Rescue host kept silent during Regan’s critique, but when he found an opening spoke to him in a calm manner, repeating the words “Ok, fair enough. Ok fair enough.”

Taffer then excused himself and went to speak quietly with the bar owner he’d berated moments earlier. He was soon joined by his producer-director David Owens, who called for a 10-minute break. Owens apparently hadn’t known of the ambush either.

Moments later, Regan and Reality Fix production chief Mel Sargant protested saying they needed to “get on with it”. Taffer finally began cooperating after Sargant got in his face yelling “this isn’t how it’s supposed to work Jon!”

We later learned that the Executive Producer of both shows Arnold Simon had given his blessing to the stunt.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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