Captions To Be Used For Donald Trump’s Future Speeches

Funny story written by K.C. Bell

Sunday, 30 August 2020

image for Captions To Be Used For Donald Trump’s Future Speeches
"What did he just say?" "Sounds like crooked Nazis?" "Nah!"

The networks have decided, to avoid any misunderstandings during a future speech given by Donald Trump (that could perhaps accidentally ignite World War III), to introduce the addition of captions at the bottom of the screen. Just above the crawl.

Like a foreign film or speeches given by foreign non-English speaking dignitaries, Donald Trump needs assistance with his language skills. His big sister cannot provide this kind of assistance.

Yes, he does manage to successfully get his point across about some things or activities, like: Grabbing a woman by the pussy. Loud and clear. Aye, aye, sir!

However, during his 70-minute acceptance speech at the Republican Convention, while on the south lawn, in front of the White House, he managed to slur some words or mispronounce other words, substituting one word for another, that misconstrued the meaning of his sentence.

Though Mr. Trump is a senior citizen, and refuses to wear glasses (or the mask), misreading a sentence could be catastrophic! Of course, not wearing a mask could be deadly.

In his speech, Mr. Trump said: He profoundly accepted the nomination.

Instead, he should have said: He proudly accepted the nomination. Close, but no cigar.

Profoundly, suggests a desperate, Thank you, god, stumbling, bumbling, I made it by my bone spurs, acceptance to the nomination.

Proudly, announces: Okay, game on.

Captions would have instantly reassured the viewer. And they will in the future, particularly at Oval Office signings.

"What did he just sign?"

"His resignation?"

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The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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