The United Red States Of America By Mitch McConnell

Written by K.C. Bell

Tuesday, 5 May 2020

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Kentucky property set for repair by blue states.

Senator Mitch McConnell of the state of Kentucky, population 6 million, (or thereabout) is renaming the United States, the The United Red States of America.

Why? Because he can.

Though he was elected by less than 6 million voters from the red state of Kentucky, and because of his seniority in the Senate, he holds the title of the Majority Leader of the Senate. He can do anything he wants to do. While appropriating money during the coronavirus pandemic for the states, he said, “No money for blue states. Let the blue states go bankrupt!”

The bankruptcy didn’t sit too well for the blue state governors.

“Hey, hey, hey,” said Governor Andrew Cuomo of New York, “that’s the dumbest thing I ever heard of. Blue states bail out states like Kentucky with our tax dollars. We put billions into the federal tax pot. Kentucky takes out much, much more than Kentucky puts into that tax pot. New York state could have a greater school system if we didn’t have to bail out states like Kentucky every year. And McConnell says let New York go bankrupt during a pandemic?”


During the last administration, McConnell prevented President Obama from making an appointment to the U.S. Supreme Court. McConnell claimed that a president couldn't appoint a new member to the Supreme Court in the last six months of his presidency.


Easy. He just made up that couldn't. When asked if Donald Trump could appoint a new member to the Supreme Court in the last six months of his office, McConnell said, “Sure, why not?”

Something is smelling stinky from Kentucky.

But former Marine Corps fighter pilot, Amy McGrath, who flew 89 missions against al-Qaeda and the Taliban, may just take care of that something smelling stinky from Kentucky. Amy McGrath is running against Mitch McConnell for his Senate seat.

"Hey, hey, hey!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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