DALLAS – Joe Biden had a huge campaign rally at The Ten-Gallon Hat Convention Center in Big D.
The first to endorse him was Pete “The Kid” Buttigieg. He said that he likes Biden because he has never made a gay joke unlike President “Rhino Butt” Trump who averages 6.7 gay jokes a day.
He also pointed out that Trump has said on many occasions that Anderson Cooper and Don Lemon both have very pronounced lisps.
Pete noted that he has never once heard Cooper or Lemon lisp, although he has heard Trump slur the words collusion, masturbate, Stormy, vibrator, hooha, and Pocahontas on several occasions.
Amy Klobuchar told the crowd that unlike the “Mar-a-Lago Liar”, Joe Biden’s face looks very normal, whereas “Blimpy” looks like a bag of Family-Sized Cheetos exploded in his face.
Klobuchar went on to say that in all honesty Trump’s IQ is probably around the low 40s. She laughed and said that he is so dumb, that he most probably would have a hard time spelling the word pussy if you spotted him the p, the u and the two s’s.
Texas native, Beto O’Rourke, took the stage in his cowboy hat, his buckskin chaps, his gingham blue western shirt, and his Roy Rogers cowboy boots. Securty guards did ask him to please leave his appaloosa out on the parking lot.
He really fired up the crowd when he said that Joe Biden is going to kick the Trumpster’s testicles so hard, that they are going to end up mingling with his tonsils.
IN CLOSING – Trump supporter, Scott Baio, was in attendance wearing a pink MAGA cap and Daisy Duke short shorts. He was promptly arrested by a couple of Texas Rangers who quickly drove him to the Texas-Oklahoma state line and tossed his tinsel town ass over into Oklahoma.