Hillary denies plot to seize nomination from Sanders this summer

Funny story written by joseph k winter

Tuesday, 25 February 2020

image for Hillary denies plot to seize nomination from Sanders this summer
Ms. Clinton already working on image campaign "just in case"

Today's rumors from news sources and Twitter indicate an insider to the Clinton Camp has candidly blown the whistle on upcoming Hillary maneuvers.

“Here’s the deal that I think is going down. I think Hillary and Bloomberg have gotten together and cooked up a scheme,” Dick Morris said on The Cats Round-table radio show on Sunday.

Mr. Morris is a Clinton supporter opposed to Bernie Sanders, and his comments suggest a strong measure of chutzpah in the Clinton Camp working toward her nomination.

Ms. Clinton has replied: “Of course not! But if called to serve my country, I certainly will!”

This Morris Insider Scoop explains that Bloomberg is in on the deal as a stalking horse for Ms. Clinton.

(Some say that should read “stalking donkey.”)

His task: siphoning off delegates so that Sanders cannot win the nomination.

Mr. Bloomberg's campaign includes spending large amounts of his personal cash, leading to charges he is trying to “buy the election” with totals in spending at over a half-billion already.

Currently, the DNC rule is that a candidate must win 51% of the delegates in order to qualify for the nomination on the first ballot.

Meanwhile, Mr. Sanders has urged that the candidate with the most delegates should win the position.

But the Clinton Camp believes Sanders cannot possibly win 51% of the delegates, because there are too many candidates.

Therefore, a second ballot will be needed, and the Super Delegates will step in at that time.

Having saved all that time and money on not actually being in the campaign prior to this point, Hillary is ready to assume the position.

“No, no, no. Nonsense! But the third time's the charm, right?” she responded.


Microsoft is reported working on an IYF App which sends out an “emergency signal,” according to intensity levels in response to “in your face” behavior.

Online dictionaries define “In your face” as “a bold, defiant and aggressive manner.”

In politics, IYF is “accompanied by confident smiling.”

Trial models of the IYF App flash red with the sound of dogs barking and a siren arriving in the neighborhood.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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