Nashville Man Overcomes Workaholism

Funny story written by Chrissy Benson

Monday, 3 February 2020

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Joey Collins is doing things differently than his workaholic dad.

Through not a lot of hard work and perseverance, Joey Collins of Nashville, Tennessee, successfully managed to overcome his inherited tendency toward workaholism.

"My dad was a workaholic, so I learned to identify the signs," he said. "Like always having the latest electronics and never having to worry about having a roof over your head."

Collins noted that his father's overly-stringent rigid work ethic of spending five days a week, and even the occasional evening, at the office, wreaked havoc on their upper middle class white family. "Especially when we wanted to talk about our emotions," he said.

Given his family history, Collins kept a careful eye out for early warning signs of workaholism in his own life. "For a while, I really made it a priority not to push myself too hard at the gym," he said. "Then I realized, what the heck am I even doing in a gym?"

He shook his head.."it's a slippery slope, man."

According to Collins, his lackadaisical efforts at avoiding becoming a workaholic have paid off - in spades. "No one has ever once called me emotionally unavailable," he said. "Because when you don't have a full-time - or even part-time - job, you're pretty much always available. I feel good about that."

Unfortunately, Collins says that his father's workaholism shows no sign of abating even at the age of 72. "He's still working around the clock," said Collins. "He said it's to support me and my brother, but I don't buy that for a second. People are always finding excuses for addiction. I'm not going to accept blame for something that's his issue."

Still, despite his healthy detachment from his father, Collins can't help but be concerned for his aging dad. "Like any addiction, workaholism is a progressive disease. It's tough to see," he said. "All I can do is try to break the family cycle."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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