Law Firm Mistakenly Gives Company Umbrella to Non-Employee Cleaning Woman

Written by Chrissy Benson

Monday, 6 May 2019

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While grateful for her services, an NYC law firm could not gift a company umbrella to a non-employee cleaning woman.

Partners at internationally acclaimed mergers and acquisitions firm Shrinks, Globe & Greid, LLP, were chagrined when, as part of the firm's annual Employee Appreciation Week, an intern in their Manhattan office mistakenly distributed a company umbrella to a cleaning woman who happened to be working on the 14th floor at the time.

"She's not actually an employee of the firm," said SGG partner Chad Phelps of the cleaning woman, Shirley Jones. "She's employed by an outside agency."

The intern who made the error, Lisa Clark, openly acknowledged her mistake, which she attributed to lack of familiarity with the firm. "I'm new here," she said. "I just didn't know."

Because the umbrellas were intended for staff only, Phelps regretfully instructed Lisa to retrieve the umbrella from Shirley, who, fortunately, hadn't yet opened it.

"It has the company logo displayed very prominently on it," said Phelps. "Had passers-by witnessed her using it, it could have had serious labor implications for the firm This one was close."

Shirley, the cleaning woman, admitted to being a little nonplussed - but not exactly surprised - at the gift retraction. "These lawyerrs, they're something," she said. "I'll leave it at that. I don't want to get sued."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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