Rainy Weekend Gives Charleston Woman Chance to Catch Up with Herself

Funny story written by Chrissy Benson

Saturday, 23 February 2019

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Unlike others who merely tolerated the recent rainy weekend, Kendra Collins truly thrived - with the help of Häagen-Dazs.

Generally so flooded with invitations to beach parties, movie premieres, weddings, and other exclusive events that her social demands can often become overwhelming, Kendra Collins of Charleston, South Carolina, welcomed the recent rainy weekend as a chance to catch up with herself.

“It can get exhausting being someone people always want to spend time with,” said Kendra. “I’m a generous person and am glad to give, but sometimes I forget to take the time to just be with me."

Kendra was able to be highly self-caring over the stormy weekend that left many others in Charleston at loose ends. She prepped her low-carb meals for the week, portioning out various deli meats, cheese sticks, and her specialty dark chocolate/coconut oil truffles into plastic baggies, ready to toss into the cooler she brings to work each day. At the same time, she took a much-needed break from her standard practice of intermittent fasting between meals, trying ten new flavors of Häagen-Dazs ice cream, and giving herself permission to eat unlimited pints of her top three favorites. The resulting spike to her blood sugar, she explained, will keep her metabolism on its toes, resulting in a rapid loss of fat, but not muscle, once she resumes her intermittent fasting schedule.

Kendra was also highly productive on her social media. Over the course of Friday night, Saturday, and Sunday, she posted 47 inspirational quotes and 61 photos of herself on Instagram, striking a happy balance between glamour and vulnerability that will serve to motivate her followers, while also preventing them from putting her on too much of a pedestal. Overall, Kendra emerged from the rainy weekend feeling really good about the fact that, unlike others who merely tolerated the gloomy low country weather, she'd truly thrived, making the most of the opportunity presented by the rainstorms.

“That’s just how I am,” said Kendra. “And I’d almost forgotten that until I really took the time to get back in touch with myself. I didn’t realize how much I’d missed me." She smiled. "Attitude is everything. I think all women need to remember that.”

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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