Things Getting Tight for Attention

Funny story written by Chrissy Benson

Monday, 18 February 2019

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Some Americans haven't paid Attention in years - and he's beginning to feel it.

For generations, thanks to regular reminders to pay him, Attention had been doing quite well for himself. These days, though, amidst a flood of social media, smart phones, and infinite other distractions, no one’s paying Attention much – and he's beginning to feel it.

“It's getting a little tight," Attention acknowledged. "I made a good living for a really long time - and I'd say I helped make living good. People noticed things, you know?”

Far from a fad trend, the directive to pay attention has a revered history in many spiritual traditions. Indeed, many have summed up the tenets of Buddhism and mindfulness in the phrase, “Pay attention.”

Unfortunately for Attention, however, people aren’t hearing the message of late. In fact, some Americans reportedly haven't paid Attention in years.

Meanwhile, however, a phonic cousin of Attention, Tension, is making out like a bandit. “I’m fed non-stop,” he confirmed.

Attention gave him a wry nudge in the ribs. “Throw a few crumbs my way sometime, would you, man?”

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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