Tamper, Florida - (Rumpy-Dumpy News): Bob Mueller’s Rasher Inquiry took a dramatic new turn today with the arrest of an old mucker pal of President Don T Rump.
Ex-GOP pork bellies peddler Roger Stoned got a 6am federal house call at his Tamper, Florida hog house this morning, accused of telling strings of porkies to the FBI.
His lawyer said Stoned, 69, categorically denied obstruction in the FBI’s rustic Cossack wild-boar pate probe - dubbed by conspiracy theorists as Mueller’s Russian Rillette.
“My client is accused of having his snout in lots of Russia - eh, rasher - troughs,” the attorney reported amid claims that thousands of nekkid rasher of bacon selfies had been discovered on the accused’s laptop.
Stoned, 69, was arrested at the Tamper, Florida hog roast Friday where agents remain, still trawling through the 000s of nude streaky rasher selfies.
Including some featuring the President’s wife.