Written by Dr. Billingsgate

Friday, 30 November 2018

image for Michael Cohen: Sasha Made Me Sing Like A Canary

BILLINGSGATE POST: "When The Twilight Is Gone And No Songbirds Are Singing."

But the songbirds were singing. Michael Cohen just performed acapella for James Mueller, or so he thought.

Although both have the same surname, Michael and Sasha Baron Cohen have little in common, other than both have made spectacles of themselves by doing dumb things; Michael because he is stupid, and Sasha by making others look stupid.

It was a scene that even Slim Everdingle and his sidekick, Detrick "Dirty Trick" Detwiler couldn't imagine. Since forming the Deep Swamp Dredging Crew, whose mission is to drain the swamp in Washington by using refurbished penis pumps discarded by Democrats who had worn them out, Slim and Dirty thought that they had seen everything. From behind the windshield of their 1951 black Studebaker Champion, they had watched clandestine meetings where James Comey and Robert Mueller were disguised as common street trollops to avoid being identified.

In one such meeting, Big Jim Comey was seen wearing one of J Edgar Hoover's old feathered boas and silver, high-heeled pumps that made him appear at least seven feet tall. Mueller was more conservatively dressed in a ruffled pink tulle and a set of Chuck Taylor Converse All-Star high-heeled sneakers that were so new they squeaked when he walked. Or was that his butt?

But this was nothing compared to what Sasha Baron had in store for Michael Cohen.

In a setup that reminded Slim of a Brooklyn pigeon drop, Sasha was dressed as Big Bird and had inveigled Michael Cohen into wearing a yellow canary outfit; something to fit the mood. Somehow Sasha had convinced Michael that he was Robert Mueller in disguise.

"Michael, I would like you to sing like a canary. And if you sing the right tune, you won’t have to be put back in a cage."

Michael: "What would you like me to sing, Big Bird Bob?"

"How about, I'll Be Home For Hanukkah?"

Michael:

I'll be home for Hanukkah
You can plan on me...

"Thanks, Michael. I knew I could."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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