Angry Narcissistic Woman Finally Succeeds In Ripping Her Boyfriend's Face Off

Funny story written by Wesley Janson

Saturday, 13 October 2018

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Stevens Point, Wisconsin. After nagging at him constantly for a few years and always telling him what he was doing wrong, Bethany Greenfield, 35, finally succeeded in her mission of actually killing her boyfriend by sticking her fingernails into his forehead and pulling his face completely off last Tuesday.

Bethany, a manipulative and pathological liar who had been cheating on Roy Benson, 29, said that ripping his face off of his head was actually pretty easy after all of the mental and psychological damage that she had already done.

"Roy was a nice young man who was looking for 'true love' when I first met him. I saw exactly where his heart was, so I decided to pull it out of his chest, eat half of it, and feed the other half to the boyfriend he never knew about while using him as someone who would tolerate my instability as well as my unpredictable mood swings," Bethany stated. "Watching a man's soul shatter into pieces while he enters a state of horrible and inescapable depression gets easy after a while," she blissfully added.

News reporters asked Bethany just exactly when her boyfriend, Roy, broke down completely and started weeping.

"It was probably when I showed him a picture of my true lover, Mike Becker, and when I told him that I had 4 other boyfriends as well," she confessed.

Noticing that Roy was upset about the issue, Bethany became defensive, said mean and horrible things to him, and then clawed his face completely off with her fingernails before he spewed out several chucks of blood, gurgled incessantly, and fell down dead on the kitchen floor.

"What's in the past is in the past. We all need to move forward in life," she angrily concluded.

Bethany Greenfield proceeded to brutally criticize lead reporter, Bill Manning, for conducting the interview in a poor manner, and then she tore his face off as well.

(If you have people skills, a passion for reporting the truth, and a knack for writing, our news staff currently has a position available.)

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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