Rosenstein and Gowdy get down to it in girlie bar but withhold fisticuffs

Funny story written by joseph k winter

Friday, 29 June 2018

image for Rosenstein and Gowdy get down to it in girlie bar but withhold fisticuffs
Dancers at "Hooters With Meaning" were getting desperate

Fresh from exchanges on the floor of Congress, last night Representative Trey Gowdy (R-SC) and Attorney General Rod Rosenstein further mixed it up at a watering hole in the back streets of Washington D.C.

The two met by accident at "Hooters With Meaning," where dancers climb gleaming silver poles.

Crowding in the club forced the two men to sit side by side along the bar in front of the performance.

Mr. Gowdy’s face was reported twisted into a comment, and Mr. Rosenstein turned to a body of attorneys accompanying him.

These gentlemen had been forced to occupy tables to the rear of Mr. Rosenstein.

What Gowdy and Rosenstein said was not entirely clear, although translated by FBI lip readers posted here and there in the club.

Mr. Gowdy was evidently enlarging upon a theme of the “animus” exhibited by DOJ investigators “who are supposed to be neutrally and detachedly investigating.”

Lip reading experts at the scene were in some dispute over the phrasing here, with some suggesting Mr. Gowdy had used the word “anus,” not “animus.”

Mr. Rosenstein was getting red during this exchange, and responded, “You cannot subpoena anybody’s animus.”

Whether Mr. Gowdy then said “It’s time to finish the hell up” is another matter in dispute by observers.

He might have said, “It’s time to finish the hell up that drink you’re swoggling,” or “It’s time to finish the hell up this investigation you’re boggling.”

Mr. Rosenstein at this point did raise his right fist, but then his hand opened to pass across his head in an apparent gesture of feeling stressed.

Meanwhile, pole dancers noticed the two men were not paying attention to them and proceeded with a number of body thrusts (associated with "Miss Bum Bum" contests) toward these two customers.

A near melee was then averted as several of Mr. Rosenstein’s accompanying lawyers surged forward in a defense to Mr. Rosenstein, with raised fists.

Mr. Gowdy spun on his bar stool with a look of disdain, but Mr. Rosenstein rose from his stool with hands raised.

Lip-reading indicates he said, “Enough! On this question of bias did you not hear me say it is classified?”

Mr. Gowdy: "And you can't subpoena national security?"

Mr. Rosenstein: "You did hear me."

Mr. Gowdy smiled. “A grand jury is waiting.”

Mr. Rosenstein’s defense people then subsided as he and they withdrew to avoid further encounters.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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