Elderly man sues weight loss program after losing fifteen pounds and three inches!

Written by b kenneth mcgee

Thursday, 17 May 2018

An elderly man from Louisburg, North Carolina has sued a well known weight loss program after losing fifteen pounds and three inches using their program. His suit is for reckless endangerment, false advertising and public humiliation. He appeared at a news conference in Raleigh.

"My life has been ruined and someone is going to pay," stated the Reverend T. J. McCorkle.

A reporter interrupted McCorkle and shouted, "But Reverend, isn't that exactly what it is supposed to do?" The journalists were obviously annoyed at being called to a news conference they thought was frivolous.

An angry McCorkle replied: "YES...what they didn't say was WHERE the three inches would be lost! For one dang thing, I can't go to the gym anymore! I was stopped by a security guard at a Charlotte restaurant and asked for my gender identity after he saw me at a men's urinal AND, after forty years of marriage and hearing...Is it in yet every time, now it's jes...IS IT? What do you think?? What would you do? For one dang thang I aint no transponder or one of them cross puzzlers! DUDE....I only got a half inch left! MY LIFE IS RUINED!"

As the journalists left the room in stunned silence, a sobbing Reverend T. J. McCorkle slowly hobbled from the podium on his walker. The company being sued by McCorkle has not, as yet, replied.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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