West Miami, Fl - Florida Republican Senator Marco Rubio was caught by his neighbors playing with his sword on his front lawn. Rubio was wearing only a rainbow designed Speedo and high healed booties. The spectacle began after midnight. The former presidential primary candidate, now running for reelection for US Senate in Florida, danced like a warrior well into the early morning before his wife called him inside.
Rubio, dubbed "Little Marco" by his former challenger Donald J. Trump, received the long thin golden sword in 2005 as a gift from then Governor Jeb Bush, a former mentor. The sword was a Bush family heirloom.
The Speedo that Rubio wore was reportedly re-gifted from disgraced NJ Governor Chris Christie, who originally received the undergarment from presidential candidate Donald J. Trump after Trump landed a Speedo endorsement contract.
The high healed booties were purchased directly by Rubio in Indiana from a very close transgendered friend of vice presidential candidate Mike Pence.
Neighbors reported that Rubio eventually yelled out like a warrior, went to his knees and cried uncontrollably, and then jumped around like a swashbuckler in a Zorro movie.
Jeanette Rubio, Rubio's wife, ended the spectacle in the middle of the night when she screamed in Spanish, "Marco, you get back in here now, you hear me? Stop playing with your sword!" Mrs. Rubio stated to one reporter that her husband often finds comfort with his sword but she feels he plays with his sword far too much.
Jeb Bush, who is reportedly in contract negotiations for a second season of the reality show "In the Bushes," filmed in Texas, is said by friends to have really enjoyed Rubio's sword when they worked together in the Florida Capitol Building, but they stopped playing with each other's swords more recently due to hurt feelings from the presidential primaries.
Rubio faces challenger Florida Rep. Patrick Murphy, who tweeted, "I have personally seen, and have seen others playing with, Marco's sword, usually in the State Capitol men's room. But you don't win an election just because you have a big sword. You win elections with a big head, like mine."
Trump tweeted, "The name 'Little Marco' had nothing to do with the size of Marco's sword. I have never seen Marco's sword, but I have seen him sweat, A LOT. Disgusting! My VP Mike Pence confirmed that Marco's little tiny sword is indeed very, very nice."