For 59 years and 121 days Lamar Astroloam spent every single day of his adult life playing the lottery. For 59 years and 121 days Lamar got nixed. So desperate to win the lottery, during his tenure on earth, Lamar had sacrificed two iphones and a laptop to the lottery gods in the hope of receiving enlightenment.
On the 122 second day after his 59th year of his pursuit of serenity, Lamar hit the jackpot, 60 million dollars in all. Unfortunately, Lamar was on his death bead listening to father Tomberson reading his last rites when the winning numbers were announced.
Around his death bed were all his family and friends who were so many, they caused the hospital to build an extra wing to fit them all in. Many were the faces of friends and family whom which Lamar had never seen before in his life. There was even a green alien named zork, amongst the group, who claimed to be his long lost brother.
Lamar had only one asset left before the lottery win. It was a 20 dollar life insurance policy which he had been paying into, 2 dollars each month, for the past decade. The beneficiary of the policy was his pet squirrel Squeaky. Lamar had a will too, in which he left all his worldly possessions to Squeaky upon his death, also.
"I want all of you to know, I'm going to make some big changes in my will to shore some things up", gasped Lamar. "I'm going to leave all of my lottery winnings to…."
Lamar never finished his sentence as a meteorite came crashing through the hospital room ceiling and smacked him right in the kisser leaving him unable to speak.
His situation caused an immediate outpouring of grief as everyone realized that they were not named sole beneficiary of his will. A Donnybrook ensued during which Lamar's ex-wife beat several people to death with a bed pan.
Like a legless frog on a dolly glued to an elevator wall, Lamar could only watch the melee as he slowly suffocated to death from the meteorite lodged in his mouth.
A police riot squad was called to put an end to the disturbance in which the police ended up arresting all people involved including the head nurse, and a doctor, who claimed to be long lost relatives of Lamar.
A probate judge would eventually rule in favor of Squeaky the squirrel who would take the proceeds and immediately buy the country of Bolivia and turn it into an acorn farm.
