Ted Cruz And Penelope Cruz Not Eligible To Run For President

Funny story written by K.C. Bell

Friday, 5 February 2016

image for Ted Cruz And Penelope Cruz Not Eligible To Run For President
She cannot run for President of United States!

Foreign-born Ted Cruz and foreign-born Penelope Cruz are not eligible to run for President of the United States. He was born in Canada and she was born in Spain. Foreign-born Arnold Schwarzeneggar, though married to a niece of a president, also cannot run for president. An American citizen today, he was born in Austria. Danny de Veto can run for president. Ted Cruz? No.

English born actress Emily Blunt, though recently becoming an American citizen and married to an American citizen, may not run for president. And though an eloquent American citizen, Arianna Huffington was born in Greece and cannot run for president.

Naturalized citizens are not the same as a land-born citizen. Picky? Petty? Pesky? Laws may sometimes appear to be a speed bump to reality, but the law is the law and the speed bump remains an ouch to reality.

Australian actress Cate Blanchett was actually land-born in Texas, (surprise, surprise) and could run for president. Mel Gibson, always thought of as Australian, was actually land-born in New York and could also run for president. Michael Caine could not run for president. Prince William could not run for president, and though the Queen of England, Elizabeth cannot run for president. The list is endless, so why does Canadian born Ted Cruz insist he is eligible to run for president?

The difference between a land-born citizen and naturalized citizen is like the difference between a landline telephone and a cell phone. Landlines are solid and continuous and locked to telephone poles dug deep into the ground and rooted. Cell phones have temporary power, run on batteries and are subject to being re-charged. They are frivolous. Drop one in water and as Governor Woops would say, "Woops!"

CNN New Orleans born Anderson Cooper could run for president, but CNN Liverpool born Richard Quest could not.

If American land-born Donald Duck, Porky Pig and Mickey Mouse were human beings, the three would be eligible to run for president. But they are not human beings and they cannot run for president.

And neither can Canadian born Ted Cruz.

Got it? Yes?

Probably not…

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The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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