Written by b kenneth mcgee

Wednesday, 9 December 2015

The crowd cheered last night at the Raleigh Convention Center when Donald Trump strode on stage with his arms held high and shouted, "No more Muslims, no more Spics, no more Jews with their dirty tricks!" The crowd went wild cheering and clapping.

Trump: "Don't get me wrong, some of my best friends are Jews." He hesitated, "but you know, enough is enough!"

Crowd: "Enough is enough!"

Trump: "And as far as the Indians go, you know, the ones with the dots and the ones with the feathers. The ones with the dots should go back to India where they came from and work for AOL and the ones with the feathers should go back to the reservation, make rugs and pots and try to pawn them off on the Antiques Road Show!"

The crowd cheered and stomped their feet.

Trump: "We are going to make America great once again! So, holster up, puff up, put your baseball caps on backwards, and be proud to be a redneck. He paused, threw his arms in the air and shouted, "BETTER RED THAN DEAD!!"

The crowd cheered.

Trump: "Together, we can do it! Our battle cry going forward, he paused, "Give hate a chance!"

The Associated Press reports that Trump cut his talk short to mingle with the crowd kissing babies and signing tattoos.Each person at the rally was given a Trump campaign t-shirt that reads:

"Leave no assholes behind!"

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Topics: Donald Trump

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more