Written by Matt Birkenhauer

Friday, 6 March 2015

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image for John Boehner, Mitch McConnell, and Benjamin Netanyahu Caught In Sexual Congress
"I have no comment on my special relationship with the Prime Minister."

WASHINGTON, D.C.-Security guards at the Capitol on Tuesday found Rep. John Boehner, Sen. Mitch McConnell, and Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu having sexual congress in one of its bathrooms, only minutes before the Prime Minister of Israel gave his speech to a joint session of Congress all but declaring war on Iran.

In all the tussle going on in the bathroom stall, according to one security guard at the scene where the threesome occurred, it was really hard to tell who was doing what with whom, though apparently Netanyahu exited the bathroom with a large smile on his face while Rep. Boehner looked a little worried. Mitch McConnell, hurriedly zipping up his pants as he was leaving the bathroom, declined to answer any questions from reporters.

After his speech before Congress on Tuesday, Netanyahu was asked about the bathroom incident. He replied: "The remarkable relationship between me, Rep. Boehner, and Sen. McConnell has always been above politics. It must always remain above politics."

When President Obama was asked about the incident, he said, "What Rep. Boehner and Sen McConnell do in their free time is their own business. As for Prime Minister Netanyahu, he can go fuck himself, unless others are willing to oblige him first."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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