Prezident Obummer has come clean--well, relatively clean.
He confessed to having had a love affair with an alien--not an illegal alien from Mexico, but with a Vulcan--well, a half human, half-Vulcan.
"I loved Spock," the prezident gushed.
"How could one not adore him?" Obummer wondered. "I mean, he had it all: he was cool, logical, big eared, level-headed, and had a huge log. He reminds me of me, and, narcissist that I am, I love him for it."
"He's also 'half-and-half,' like the prezident," Obummer's handlers noted. "The prezident is half-black, half-human; Spock is half-Vulcan, half-human."
Obummer and Spock moved on after their short-lived affair, however, Spock marrying, first, Sandra Sober and, then, Susan Babe. He tried to find the same level of love and commitment with women as he and the prezident shared, but, the Vulcanized human admitted, "Once you've had black, there's no going back."
The prezident married Michelle (nee Michael Lavaughn Robinson), by whom he fathered two daughters, Malia Ann and Natasha Sasha.
"Michelle and I have had some good times, both when she was Michael and now that she's Michelle, but none compare to the times that Spock and I shared; those days were, and remain, out of this world!"
"I miss him" Obummer sobbed, "the way Joe misses his butt buddy."