Rush Limbaugh Denies That His Weight Gain Is Due To An Obsession With Pickles

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Tuesday, 3 December 2013

image for Rush Limbaugh Denies That His Weight Gain Is Due To An Obsession With Pickles
Rush Limbaugh shown with one of his 12-inch cigars. (Photo provided by Mrs. Rush Limbaugh).

NEW YORK CITY - Conservative radio talk show host Rush Limbaugh is reportedly upset at a recent story he read in a supermarket tabloid.

Limbaugh stated that as he was standing in the checkout line at a local grocery store he happened to notice the latest edition of the publication Just Saying.

And in big red bold letters just above a photo of him it read, Rush "Tubby" Limbaugh's weight gain is due to his addiction to pickles.

Limbaugh was furious. He later informed his listening audience that he may eat four or five big pickles a day, but that hardly qualifies as being an addiction.

He noted that he mostly just sucks on the pickles in much the same manner he sucks on his 12-inch cigars.

Limbaugh was recently asked by Jefferson Sierra with National Focus Magazine if he didn't think that a grown man sucking on 12-inch cigars all day long may have some kind of keep rooted meaning.

Limbaugh joked that he has been doing it for many years and not once has he ever thought of his 12-inch cigar as nothing more than a 12-inch cigar.

SIDENOTE: Jefferson Sierra noted that Rush Limbaugh can say what he wants but Dr. Phil would most certainly have lots of questions about Limbaugh deriving so much pleasure from eating pickles and sucking on 12-inch cigars.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more