Utah Votes To Restrict Women's Breasts To Size D or Smaller

Written by Abel Rodriguez

Saturday, 20 July 2013

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The woman shown in the photo is now a D-cup after having had breast reduction surgery.

SALT LAKE CITY - The Utah Senate has just passed a bill by a vote of 60-52 that will restrict the size of the breasts of women citizens of Utah

Senator Buffington D. Sweden [D-Provo] spoke with Tequila Tallyhoo of Left Coast Mirror Magazine and told her that the bill was passed because of pressure from a dozen women's organizations including the highly influential Ogden group Females For Normal Looking Breasts.

Senator Sweden noted that Utah Senate Bill 36077 states that any female citizen of the state of Utah cannot have breasts that exceed a D-cup in size.

The Senator, who pointed out that his own wife Cora Rae Sweden is a C-cup, explained that women who have boobs that are bigger than a D-cup tend to be looked upon as wanting to show off their womanly figures.

He also stated that just about every woman who resides in Utah and is a D-cup or bigger has at one time or another been confused for a former Las Vegas showgirl.

SIDENOTE: Senator Sweden said that the new law will become effective at 12:25 a.m. on Wednesday, July 31. He explained that will give any Utah women who are presently bigger than a D-cup enough time to schedule breast reduction surgery.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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