Same sex marriage, now same person marriage?

Funny story written by Andria Rin

Sunday, 16 September 2012


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In times past it would be called a sexual deviance, but today many people are worried that it will be yet another that gets labeled an "orientation". Heterosexual, homosexual, pansexual, metrosexual, and now autosexual? The sexual attraction to ones self. Is this another form of orientation? At what point does it stop?

In Baltimore, a man applied for a marriage license to wed himself. He claimed that he is not gay. He said he was a Republican, a Harvard graduate, and explained he truly loves himself and that there is no one else that is good enough for him so he might as well marry himself. He claimed that he doesn't believe in gay marriage and his marriage is not gay. For it to be a same sex marriage, the "same sex" has to be from a different person that is the same. The same sex from the same person is not the same sex, because the sex never changed so it is already the same. A lawsuit is pending based on the courts rejection of the application.

A woman in Waxahachie Texas has attempted to marry herself claiming that only the physical flesh is her, and that the rest is Jesus Christ. When she accepted the Lord Jesus Christ into her heart, the insides became his and now she wants to marry those insides. She believes that everyone should accept Jesus into their body so that they can marry him as well. Only if you are female though. Marriage is still defined by one man and one woman in her mind. It's not adultery either. When one accepts Jesus into their heart a new person is created within that person. That is the rebirth from washing away your sins. The Jesus that she marries is not the same Jesus that others will marry. Civil Unions for the males have been discussed, but so far all attempts have failed. A lawsuit has been filed.

It all seems to have started from a leak at a mental hospital where a patient with a dual personality disorder had had one personality propose marriage to the other personality. The leak to the web was meant to be laughed at, but instead it caught on and now many are embracing the idea of self love. Several books have been written on the subject. Some books have been rediscovered from the past to learn that this idea is nothing new. Throughout history there has been some sort of self marriage ritual in a society.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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