Gandhi's Handy Shandy Secret Revealed

Funny story written by Earl Grey

Thursday, 28 January 2010


The funny story you are trying to access may cause offense, may be in poor taste, or may contain subject matter of a graphic nature. This story was written as a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you wish to back out now, please click here to go back to the home page.

image for Gandhi's Handy Shandy Secret Revealed
"Mr Baldwin, look out he's going to blow!"

Official papers just released have finally cleared up one of history's greatest mysteries. Why was Gandhi so passive? The answer: he was knackered because he used to jerk off over a hundred times a night. He was so tired he even wandered round in sheets with highly dubious stains all over.

When Gandhi was a young lawyer he showed signs of real passion and anger. However he was soon struck down by the medical condition Wankalotitis. Within months he had gone from wearing neat suits and having a career to wearing soiled bed linen and having no energy.

When he went to London and met the King he was said to have been so excited that he couldn't control himself. One spurt hit Stanley Baldwin in the eye. On another occassion Gandhi was asked to lead a demonstration. He did so with the chant "2,4,6,8 willies out and masturbate!" Quite what this had to do with salt we will never know.

Gandhi is one of the most famous wankers in history. Other bed linen tossers include Jesus Christ and Demis Roussos.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more