Business Destroyed By Ice Cube

Funny story written by Nick Hobbs

Saturday, 16 January 2010

image for Business Destroyed By Ice Cube
Ice cube? No it is an 'ice bit', measure it, you'll see!

A man in Bracknell has taken his local watering hole to court over alleged misleading information of a drink he was served.

The Blue Boar served Daniel Wagstaff a rum and coke at approximately 9:37pm on Friday night. The barmaid asked if he would like ice cubes with his rum. Mr Wagstaff replied 'yes please'.

When the drink was poured the barmaid duly placed three pieces of ice in his glass.

Mr Wagstaff, who had been drinking in the establishment since 6.15pm that evening, took one look at his drink and immediately reached for his tape measure.

One by one, the building contractor measured his ice cubes, and found them to be of unequal size.

"Excuse me, Miss," said Wagstaff, "but these are ice 'bit's', not cubes, cubes are of equal height, width and length! These 'bit's' are all over the place!"

"I'm sorry sir,"replied Charlene, for that was the barmaid's name, "but I don't make the ice, the machine does!"

At this point Wagstaff placed his beverage on the bar and took photographic evidence on his mobile telephone.

The next morning Gordon Baggiss, landlord, was served a writ pertaining to the alleged offence of false advertising.

Wagstaff claims he was sold a lie. Promised 'cubes' and delivered 'bits' he feels short changed and misled. "I paid good money for ice cubes and the young girl, through no fault of her own, gave me something so far off a cube it might as well have been triangular. I feel violated"

If Mr Wagstaff wins his case he is set to walk away with £52,000. If he loses he will pay £32.50 court expenses.

The case is set to continue at East Berkshire Magistrates Court next Wednesday.

This could be a test case for a long line of possible advertising infringements nationwide. And what's more worrying is this could actually be true, you have been warned!

More as we're concerned about it.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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