Labour show true colours again !

Funny story written by Ulver

Monday, 16 November 2009

A massive row has broken out after an Essex Labour candidate "need we say any more ?" called the Queen a "parasite" and likened her to "vermin".

Peter White, or Comrade "oh" Shite as he is now known in Labour circles, used the arsebook networking site to express his feelings about the Queen to Tory MP Andrew "Rossy" Rosindell.

Mr White plans to contest the South Hornchurch council ward in the London Borough of Havering 1in 2010, (good luck with that you'll be hard pressed to contest a job serving fries in McDs at this rate).

The former Labour election agent in Romford made his comments as he condemned plans to celebrate the Monarch's Diamond Jubilee in 2012.

Current Romford MP Rosindell had last week presented a bill calling for a public holiday to mark the anniversary.

South Hornchurch is in the constituency of Dagenham and Rainham, a pernicious hotbed of chavery and borderline fascism, currently held by Labour's Jon Cruddas, but hotly contested by the tories and the local BNP, who let's face it nobody is likely to vote for unless some inveterate arse starts revealing their true Marxist colours and f*cks things up ....... hang on !

Comrade Shite wrote :"Don't get me wrong, I have no problem with a public holiday but lets [sic] have one that means something, rather than celebrating vermin."

Hang on a minute, the Queen Vermin, a suggestion that she takes money from the public purse for nothing and is a waste of space, doesn't that sum up every MP found with their grubby hands in the expenses pot. Talking of pots Comrade here's a Kettle is it black ?

Current Romford MP Mr Andy "Rossy" Rosindell said he was "disgusted" by Shite's remarks.

He told the Monthly Cycle: "I think for someone holding a supposedly responsible position in the Labour Party to state publicly that the Queen is a parasite and vermin is most outrageous and disgusting." Mr Rosindell obviously forgot that both Comrades Blair and Brown were ardent Marxists who called for the dissolution of the monarchy and supported Irish Republican groups back in the day, he obviously also missed a trick with odious KGB lackey Ken Livingstone's calls for a republic throughout his dubious terms in office. Come on "Rossy" if you're going for gold when Brown's mob hand you a clanger then go for it don't stop at bronze

No Hoper and nobody Comrade Shite scrawled his bile onto Rossy's arsebook page and immediately dozens of people started slating him.

He has tried to justify himself but he quickly removed the post. Shite today appeared to stand by his remarks.

"Maybe you could say I went too far, but that's for other people to judge," (like the voters of South Hornchurch) he told the London Evening Standard.

"I think that Republicanism is a valid viewpoint and there are plenty of people who agree with me, unfortunately most of them aren't British citizens or voters, in fact I have to say that the people who agree with me tend to be former members of the Supreme Soviet and 1980s Extreme lefties but well you get my point."

A London Labour Party spokesperson said: "Peter White has been summoned to a meeting with key members of the local party and officers from the London Regional Labour Party, to be given the order of Lenin by Comrade Brown."

"He will be required to explain his comments and they will consider his future, it may well be that we recommend him for higher honours or suggest him as a future leader of the Supreme sorry we meant Mr Brown's cabinet."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more