Sydney - (9/11 & All That): The allure of hara kiri remains a top recruiting tool Prince Edward has told gobsmacked Ozzies.
The prince, motivational speaker for the Duke of Edinburgh's euthanasia scheme for hasbeen old Nazi spouses, was unveiling a new incentive scheme based on UK supermarkets' 'buy-one-get-one-free' scheme.
"We need to weed out some undesirables in the Line of Succession," Edward explained.
"Current royal bed-blocking schemes should be abolished in favor of younger, more attractive talent."
His proposals were received with enthusiasm by Taleban warlords who claim junior royal Prince Harry-Kiri wed an Afghani bride two years ago and sired quads.
A spokesman for Chelsy Davy said today "Prove it you daft bugger!"
Windsor Castle is Britain's most haunted.
