Day of the Damned: Illuminati split on Monday's Hunters Moon/Beavers Moon omens

Funny story written by queen mudder

Sunday, 1 November 2009

image for Day of the Damned: Illuminati split on Monday's Hunters Moon/Beavers Moon omens
Rattlesnake Nebula matriarch and her Skull 'N' Bones rent boy

London - (Dark Side of the Moonies): "It's the World War I numeorology that's cracking them up," a Hellfire Club bouncer warned today ahead of Monday's 19.14GMT lunation.

The cult grandees' secret conclave has been in freefall ever since NASA bombed their 'lunar Stonehenge' temple on 9 October.

To fend off a total schizm the Illuminati have been ordered to prepare for their octogenarian torchbearer's ritual sacrifice.

This must take place under tomorrow's Hunters Moon - or Blood Moon/Beavers Moon as it is known - to preserve Goddess of the Hunt Princess Diana's Merovignian bloodlines.

"Damned Split Beavers Moon twaddle" the Archbishop of Canterbury's proctologist hissed as Wills' and Harrys' DNA tested negative for Droit de Seigneur and knobless oblige.

The conjunction of Buckingham Palace ley lines configures at 9.11 degrees of the Rattlesnake Nebula.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more