25,000-volt cable terrifies Hogwarts Eurostar Express platform 9¾ passengers

Funny story written by queen mudder

Thursday, 24 September 2009

image for 25,000-volt cable terrifies Hogwarts Eurostar Express platform 9¾ passengers
Disgruntled parselmouth's Autumn Equinox serpensortia invocation?

London - (Slytherin Stuff): "We thought it might be Lord Voldemort's pet snake Nagini," a terrified passenger on the 5.13pm Paris to London Hogwarts Eurostar Express cried as a hexed live power cable came crashing down onto platform 9¾ at St Pancras Station yesterday.

The incident sparked widespread fears that a disgruntled parselmouth had cursed the Express service with an Autumn Equinox serpensortia invocation.

But the identity of the fiendish prankster behind the Slytherin's Basilisk incident remains a mystery.

British Rail said today they blamed unusual celestial activity in the Ophiuchus snake-holder constellation which the Sun normally transits around Halloween

The serpentine star cluster lies near the fabled zodiac karma traps of Acquila (The Eagle), Serpens (Snake-in-the-Grass) and Hercules (Jolly Green Giant).

JK Rowling has a boa constrictor tattoo on her forked tongue.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot