Home Sexcretary In Virgin Porn Cash Swindle

Funny story written by Earl Grey

Sunday, 29 March 2009

image for Home Sexcretary In Virgin Porn Cash Swindle
Now Available On MPs Expenses

Jaqui Splff, Home Sexcretary, has been involved in yet another scandal. It seems that her husband has been sitting at home (one of their homes) and has been indulging in some pocket billiards. Obviously being the spouse of a cabinet minister can be lonely with all the late night sittings.

However, it has been discovered that the British tax payers are having to pay the bill for his sexual gratification. Should porn channels provided by Virgin be classified as essential parliamentary business? Is this why the House has been known to rise? And was 'Big Ben' really the former left wing MP for Chesterfield?

The government has moved fast to cover up (surely to rectify the situation?). Spliff has said that the money will be paid back. Her husband deeply regrets (getting caught) "I didn't know they were porn movies. I thought 'Top Heavy Models' was about monster trucks, which I really like. And I thought 'Monster Cock Rampage II' was a horror film about a big farmyard bird. It was an honest mistake."

The whole cabinet will meet to discuss how to fiddle their expenses without getting caught. Gordon Broon is thought to be very angry with the bankers. At least I think that's what he said.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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