The famous clock tower in Westminster, often mistakenly known as Big Ben, which is actually the name of the Bell, has been charged with Benism, it emerged today, as the government feel it could offend Bens.
"We are making sure this case is dealt with in the up most professional manner" Gordon Brown said in a statement.
Big Ben, now known as the "Ethnic Relations Community Clock", will also have it's Bell insulated with a 2 foot thick proofing wall to make it quieter, as the government fear it could also offend people who use hearing aids, called "pardonism", A new law the government introduced 5 minutes ago.
Both new laws if broke will result in an instant £500 fine and a possible 1 month prison sentence.
The Ethnic Relations Community Clock refused to comment, "this is possibly due to the fact that it's a clock tower and bloody well can't" Said City Hall Councilor Richard Barnbrook. "It doesn't matter what it is, everyone shall be treated equally regardless of their background, be it Asian or clock tower." said Margret Hodge
"If Mr Ethnic Relations Community Clock doesn't want to talk about the incident then we must respect that"