Dog trains man to bring post

Funny story written by Noshing Mink

Sunday, 2 September 2007

image for Dog trains man to bring post
Fetching the mail each morning from the Post Office

Mr. Cain Nyne admitted to our reporter that his German Shepherd, Rufus trained him using a rewards system. Whenever he did something right, he would get a black pudding.

The 33 year old IT consultant quickly learned a number of tricks, including "sit", "stand", "down", "speak", "pee" and "shit". Since he lives in Yorkshire, where no houses have indoor toilets, he has to be put out first thing in the morning and last thing at night to "do his business".

Mr. Nyne said that being a household pet is quite a nice life. He gets treats all the time and is allowed to lie in a special basket next to the fire when it is cold. He gets two square meals a day and doesn't have to do the washing up.

"I was a bit pissed off when I was neutered", he admitted, "and it was bloody painful for weeks, but I've learned to live with it. This way, I can give the bitch next door a good seeing to without putting her up the spout."

If you are a household pet and would like to share your experiences with us, drop us a line. Please get your master's permission first, though.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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