London - (Ass Mess): The Crown Prosecutions Service has told police they can go ahead and arrest all the villains in the cash-for-peerages-and-NHS terrorists case after an extended investigation found that former Saudi ambassador to the US ordered Tony Blair to fill the Lords with Bush Family Evil Empire mobster cartels.
The police probe is also understood to have taken in over sixty colorful characters linked to Margaret Thatcher's and Dame Shirley Porter's Westminster gerrymandering scam of the late 1980s.
As he cowers in his newly furbished Connaught Square pad former Prime Monster Tony Blair has had his passport confiscated and told not to leave the country on any old-style freebie holiday until he gets that long-awaited 6am knock on the front door.
Lord Levy, Ruth Turner and Sir Christopher 'Bung' Evans all face up to 30 years in the slammer apiece after their long-lost IRA files suddenly surfaced along with Mohammed Fayed's.
And Tory wide boy David Cameron along with his British Fascits Party kith and kin the Astors and the Mitfords may have the biggest shock of all as a special prosecution file is assembled describing his twenty year reign of terror as George Bush Senior's personal UK hitman.
"We hope to give the public real value for money when we arrest these shambolic mobsters," a police source said today.
"After all the excitement of Wimbledon there can be a bit of a lull in public expectations this time of year.
"But this time we're ready and have plenty of bang for the public's buck.
"Sir back, relax and enjoy!"
