Written by Shaun Ferguson

Tuesday, 19 June 2007

Bernard Manning, Britain's best loved comedian, was found dead in the early hours of this morning.

Funny man Manning 76, who was renown for his hilariously irreverent stories about minority groups and blatantly sexist jokes, shot to fame on television in the early 1970's.

Tributes have been pouring in from devotees of his bigoted take on everyday life.

The Ku Klux Klan has described him as "irreplaceable", while the Austrian Nazi Party has been reported as "inconsolable".

The police are treating his death as suspicious and a coloured man, a Jew and a Pole are helping them with their enquiries. The Met have also announced they will be drafting the Jamaican police to assist in the investigation.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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