Powdered Wigs Decree A Turing Fifty Pee

Funny story written by Ana Sian

Saturday, 4 March 2023

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One Must Be Dead Before Becoming a Wig's Money

Hope has just arrived for trans people or anyone who is well-hated by today’s standards. Not to worry, sir or madam, but you will one day be loved. Just look at the new British 50 pound note!

Alan Turing was forced to have chemical castration instead of jail time by the Powdered Wigs of his enlightened day and age – even though he saved Buckingham Palace from having to hang the swastika flag – with or without King Eddy VIII’s approval. (Is he the Andrew of his time?)

Though he saved Britain from Hitler, he had to commit suicide because he was gay.

But now he’s on the 50!

So to all those who are hated – the future black king or queen of the Britons, from Harry and Meghan’s line (you know it’s gonna happen … 50 years, like the new pound?) – you too may one day be on the money! Maybe a stamp or two too! Maybe in the next Harry Potter book once Disney buys the franchise.

All you have to do is die, because today’s Powdered Wigs are smarter and fairer and believe in justice and goodness and equality … ahem, they are better than you and your drag show. Which is still the WORST THING to EVER HAPPEN to the WORLD … EVER!

Can I borrow a Turing or two? I can’t afford food. Thanks, Powdered Wigs.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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