LONDON – (UK Satire) – Piers Morgan has just announced that there is no one happier in the entire UK than his girlfriend, the former Duchess of York, Sarah Ferguson.
Morgan noted that his British babe’s brand new adult shoppe named The Lascivious Lobster Adult Sex Toy Shoppe had January sales of £9 million.
He noted that the number one adult sex toy seller is the Glow-in-The-Dark Heavy Metal Cage.
Morgan informed Bee’s Knees News Agency reporter Emma McPiddlehilton, that the MetCage, as it is known throughout Europe and Japan comes in three sizes: small, very small, and tiny-as-hell.
Meanwhile, Fergie, as most people call her, says that she is as happy as a Japanese Tea Beetle in an English Tea Shoppe.
