"All a misunderstanding," says Xmas flasher

Funny story written by Joel Kaye

Thursday, 7 January 2021

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A bauble ... earlier

Absent-minded pensioner Neil Anconfess claimed in court that his apparently deliberate act of indecent exposure was simply a misunderstanding.

“It was all because of the Christmas tree. I was trying to put up decorations and the wife was looking into my boxes.”

“Your boxers?” asked magistrate Lady Sharp.

“No,” said Mr Anconfess, “my boxes of decorations, which I have had for years. And she says, ‘Your baubles are all dusty.’ Well, I was disappointed, even at my age, and I’d only just had a shower. So, I went to have a look.”

“With the curtains open?” asked Lady Sharp.

“Well, no, with my flies open. That’s the only way I could check, you see.”

“I was shocked at what I saw,” said neighbour Doris Allwaysopen. “And I’ve seen some things.”

Mr Anconfess was sentenced to be bound over. “That does sound interesting,” he said later.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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