Duncan Blenkinsopp, despite having too much offence as it is, has taken a lot more.
'I looked out my window, and I was offended by the clouds, the leaves on the ground, next door's cat, the house next door's children, and that was before I even got dressed,' said Duncan.
He continued: 'Then, when I got dressed, I was offended by my socks, my underpants, and my shirt. Don't even start on my shoes.'
Surprisingly, Duncan is married. His wife, Linda, told us: 'Duncan takes offence at everything, so I don't have to. I always tell him to let things be, but does he? No, he doesn't the ###### snowflake.'
