Dominic Cummings Has Disappeared

Funny story written by Monkey Woods

Tuesday, 16 June 2020

image for Dominic Cummings Has Disappeared
Doesn't know whether he's Cummings or going

There was mild concern in Whitehall last night, when it was realised that Dominic Cummings, Prime Minister Boris Johnson's chief advisor and political strategist, hadn't been seen for a while, and may have actually disappeared.

Cummings, whose home is in Islington, London, had, until recently, had his face in everywhere - particularly places it wasn't wanted - but has now uncharacteristically vanished from under the public spotlight.

Many people have welcomed this break from seeing his ugly mug.

Political analysts say Mr. Cummings may be 'in hiding', as he waits for the dust to settle after his wanderlust recently got the better of him, resulting in a joyride from London to Durham during a ban on such excursions - a ban imposed by himself.

This disobeyance of the rules incurred the wrath of the British people on a large scale, and many called - unsuccessfully - for his sacking.

One Labour MP, who didn't want naming, said:

"Is it unfair to think he may have been abducted by aliens?"

Nobody is looking for Mr. Cummings.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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