Homeschooled Kid Expelled

Funny story written by Dewani Unhatched

Saturday, 18 April 2020

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Twat (NOT because he is ginger)

A homeschooled student has been expelled from his home after his teacher (Mum) smelled marijuana on his clothing during a maths lesson.

Neil Morris, 14, from Luton, is, however, protesting his innocence.

"I feel like my teacher (Mum) could've handled it way better, because she could've asked any other students (my brother and sister, aged 7 and 9). She could've smelled them, but she picked me."

The expulsion notice mentions several members of staff (Dad, Uncle Jim, and Aunt Lavinia) smelling him. He then said he was searched.

"The Headmaster (Dad) made me take everything out of my pockets, and made me take off my shoes as well as pull up my jogging bottoms, and he didn't find anything at all. I didn't have anything at all," protested Morris.

His mother (teacher), Joan Morris, an accounts clerk, was called to the school (living room) where she tried to prove her son's innocence.

"I took a drug test up to the school (living room), and I drug tested my son in front of his teacher (me) and the head (my husband, Joe). They (us) saw the results, and they came back negative."

According to The Morris Family Code of Conduct, "Marijuana on breath or person" is a violation that carries a10-day suspension, or a recommended expulsion.

As of Friday, Neil has been sleeping and eating his supper in the shed. His parents are hoping that their neighbours, the Macdonalds and their children Darren and Kylie, will find a place for their son in their living room when lessons recommence again on Monday.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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