Dentist Offering door to door service

Written by Ben Macnair

Wednesday, 8 April 2020

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All of them out then, Mr Asshat?

Dentist and sociopath, Neville Longbottom III, is offering a door-to-door dentistry service to the citizens in the Fritz area.

From Chutney on the Fritz to Mithering on the Trent, a short 12 miles away, people are offered crowns, fillings, and pointless conversations that they can't answer.

Longbottom, young enough to be named after a character in Harry Potter, has recently been released from prison for GBH, where he learnt his trade in the dental arts.

'Of course,' he growled, 'if you would prefer it, I could just knock all of your teeth out with a hammer. I wouldn't recommend it really, though. It would hurt, a lot.'

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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