Meghan and Harry storm the job market

Written by T. Loaf

Friday, 10 January 2020

image for Meghan and Harry storm the job market
Born to poke...

Yep, the finches had been warbling it for weeks. But no-one wanted to listen. And now, Meghan, or rather the cat, has been let out of the bag. The Duchess of Sussex and Prince Harry have had enough. Now it's official. Now there's no going back. Now life can begin again for the, well, relatively newlyweds and their pedigree son, Archie Harrison. Now they're free to venture into normality, fend for themselves, build Jerusalem on both sides of the pond. It's now or never.

"Work", said Prince Harry, "that's what we're gonna do. Yes, it'll be a hard climb, but we're ready. Admittedly, I haven't had much practice, but I'll try my hand at anything."

And, yep, they've shifted into fast gear from the start. Both have jobs both sides of the Atlantic. In England, Meghan works at the till at Lidl, and as a dishwasher at Chuck's Chunky Chickens in her native Los Angeles.
Harry, meanwhile, labours with a wrench at Dagenham's local tyre-changing shack, 'Pete's Wheels', and then as a parking lot attendant in downtown LA.

"It's enough to pay the rent," explained Harry. "And we really do hope to get on the property ladder soon. We're saving like mad. We've applied for a nursery place for Archie asap, but have to fill in forms and things first. It was then I noticed I can't read or write, so Meghan does all that. I enjoy taking the rubbish out, and would love to drive one of those trucks. But so many others want to as well. Strange. Also, all this paying for stuff gets right up my royal nostrils. What a rip off! I work day in day out, and then even the newsagent wants money from me for crisps, chocolate and the Gazette. I mean, you shouldn't have to pay for that sort of thing, and I only got the money the day before. What sort of a system is this? Weird, man, weird."

Indeed...

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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