Brexit Box

Written by Backandtotheleft

Wednesday, 27 February 2019

The BBC and ITV have teamed up to release the new online streaming service “BritBox” in the UK. The service quickly dubbed “BrexitBox” by heroic Brexiteers will only show the best of the best of the best of British programming.

Mike Smallwood of the International Brexit alliance said:

"It’s a huge step forward and a solid slap in the face of the remoaners, bastards! We fully expect a diverse and entertaining selection of programs to be available, all showcasing great British film-making, without any interference from the EU."

The streaming service aims to show British made TV programs in their original unedited content.

John Markson of the Union of Worldwide Hard Brexiteers said:

"Finally, we’ll be able to watch all of our God-fearing shows like they were intended to be watched. With all the “blackface” and “What Ho Darky!” high jinks that we used to get away with, before all this lefty liberalism made it “offensive” not to employ somebody because they're a different colour to you. World's gone mad!"

Of course, the beauty of the BBC is that it has always tried to show UK society in all its glory, showing all the different cultures that inhabit this....oh fuck here’s another one.

John Pinder of the Federation for Delivering A Granite Brexit Or The Country Will Fucking Explode came sprinting over to us wheezing and gulping-in lungfuls of pure British air. He said (eventually):

"Idon’t like foreigners, and I fear women. After getting the vote, they’ve been nothing but trouble. Hopefully the new BrexitBox will only show programs filled with whites, and where every young girl knows her place. I mean if we could get to a point where the Scots, Welsh and Irish are off our screens for good as well, that would be delightful, but it’s all about small steps."

Small steps off a long pier.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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